New Perspective

I now work in downtown Buffalo. If you have never toured that particular area, you truly should. Every day I get to walk down Main Street right into the heart of downtown with its award-winning architecture  all around me. Granted, it's an urban area, so it also has its share of ugliness and unsavory characters. I don't have any illusions about staying aware of my surrounding when I leave every evening. But right outside my window and just down the street, I get to marvel at some gorgeous buildings every day. Immediately outside my window I see the the Electric Tower (formerly the Niagara Mohawk Building). Designed by James A. Johnson and completed in 1912, every holiday season the top tiers light up once the sun goes down in red, green, and white light on the top level. It brings me back to childhood: Every time I saw that tower lighting up in those colors, I knew it meant Christmas wasn't far behind. Just beyond that is the Buffalo Savings Bank with its beautiful top, formerly (appropriately) the Gold Dome building. Look as well at the clock tower and surrounding facade for the detail. Right now the sun has lit up that dome, making it seem warmer outside than it really is, thanks to the biting wind. Directly in front of me, my window looks out on the old Olympic Tower, commissioned in 1901 as a  new facility for the second oldest YMCA chapter in the United States and built in an English- Flemish Renaissance style. I love looking at it after I've focused on small print for a while--quite a  nice contrast for my eyes. Even the Hyatt Regency manages to keep some of the old-style architecture with its brick facade and pale green roof, also a stone's throw from my building.  If I walk just a little ways down, I get into the Theater District with Shea's Buffalo, one of the old theaters. I've added the photo gallery for the inside because...just look. You'll understand. Shea's also evokes Christmas memories of donning my prettiest velvet dress to go see The Nutcracker and gaping in awe at the ceiling and other details. I still do.  (detail of the arch on top of Shea's...you can just see it in the top-hand right corner of the picture above) I love the old-style lights. And just a few more random Theater District pictures for you: Tent City! This is a place that sells tents and other Am Vet-type gear...talk about repurposing. Cepa Gallery (photographic art center) There's so much more that I could show you...and I haven't even done a walking tour, which they have many of. I even love the old millinery factory behind me, although it's one of too many buildings downtown that sits vacant, waiting to be repurposed or used in a different way. Too much of Buffalo is that way, but that's an entirely different post. I just wanted to show off my city a bit and express my gratitude that I get to see a little bit of it as I go through my day.

Baby Steps

Last week, J began speech therapy. I've mentioned things a bit before, but the long and short is that he's almost 17 months old and really doesn't say any real words. He sort of says "mama" and "dada", and he makes repetitive noises ("babababababa", etc.). He understands quite a bit, but those actual words have yet to really form. So we had him evaluated, and the conclusion came out that he has some delays and would benefit from some extra help. Last week he met with his two therapists (one every other week so he has someone working with him once a week), and he responded to them very well, even hugging the one at the end of the session. He just knows people come to play with him; he doesn't realize he's getting help with his speaking. My mom also sat in on the one session: He has to meet his ladies at day care, so we don't get to see what they do, unfortunately (we trade notebook entries back and forth), so it was terrific for mom to observe and take copious notes. We have a little "homework" to work on with him, mainly repetition of just a few words and signing.

Well, two days ago at dinner, I repeated the word "more" numerous times and did the sign for it before I would give him more mac & cheese (always helps to use a much-desired food!). I showed him what to do and put his own little hands together to make the "more" sign. Lo and behold, he did it himself and after a brief explosion of delight on my end, I passed out the desired mac. He seemed to begin to comprehend the connection, but I figured it would come slowly. Next morning, before he even came downstairs, he began signing "more" to T for his morning Cheerios! The kid has picked up the sign with a vengeance.

This makes me so incredibly happy--he's realizing he can communicate with us to get what he wants. The words will come (we still say "more" about a zillion times when we sign and talk to him) next and when he's ready, with a little help. J may not take the "usual" trajectory of talking that other kids do, but he's making progress a day at a time, going at his own pace, and, again during this holiday season, I am so utterly thankful.

Oh, and he knows where his tummy is: Just ask, and he'll yank up his shirt and slap his round little toddler gut. It's the best.

OK, round two. Last weekend we went to a pumpkin farm with my sister M, her husband C, and their darling daughter, C. We took them for the two main reasons you take toddlers to a pumpkin farm: 1) to buy pumpkins, and 2) to take tons of pictures because, really, who could resist?

                                                  Answer? Nobody. 

 

That's not distorted perspective: the place had gigantic pumpkins the size of small car tires. We loved seeing the kids examine them.

 

C adores J and won't stop hugging him. As you can see, he's not quite as enamored. Perhaps it has to do with her rather aggressive hugs, which still knock him over.

 

This picture may seem a bit unfair to J, but it's only because we know that one day he'll either hug back or finally get bigger and defend himself against her loving embrace.

 

The farm had white pumpkins called "ghost pumpkins"--I'd never seen that before. Very nice contrast to the bright orange of the others.

 

I just love the haphazard shapes and varied colors of little gourds. 

 

 

Happy fall family!

In other news, we're finally getting J tested for his speech, or lack thereof. He's a bit behind as compared to others his age, and he doesn't point very much, which I've found out also correlates to talking because it's a form of communication. After speaking to Feather Nester (she has expertise in this area) about it, we decided to get Early Intervention involved. Either they'll tell us to relax and see where he is at 18 months or they'll suggest something more to do, either one of which works for T and me. We just need some guidance. If it turns out we've made a First-Time Parenting Freak-out Move, that's fine, too. We just want to make sure J can communicate with us and others. He seems to understand quite a bit, so that makes us wonder if it's that he can talk but won't, for whatever reason. Mercifully, because we live in the school district, everything is free and they're very accommodating. I'll keep you posted. In the meantime, he seems to be settling in to day care, slowly but surely, and he's getting molars and growing and just a happy guy, which is all we want.

Good food, good folks, good fun

This past weekend I had a few friends over for a Fabulous Females Night--specifically my busy mom friends. I asked that they each send me a copy of their favorite easy, go-to, weeknight meal and bring some to share. The result was five of us around my little kitchen table eating and talking about cooking, kids, and just about everything else under the sun. We all remarked how great it was to eat something we might never think of ourselves and how nice it was to get out of the house and chat, just the ladies. Truly, that's exactly why I did it: I don't give myself time with other female friends--sans kid--often enough. T actually encourages me to do so more frequently. I too often fall into the Teri Hatcher mode of metaphorically "eating the burnt piece of toast", taking the bad for myself so others can have the good. She wrote a book of a similar name...who knew a former Desperate Housewife could hit certain aspects of motherhood on the head so well? But I do--I take the scraps to make sure everyone else has what they need. That puts me in danger of the martyr role, and I do not want to go down that road. Fortunately I have T, who will never let me do that, and, as I wrote, he reminds me to get out of the house and have my own fun. And why wouldn't I want to have more nights like the one I just did? Do any of you do that? How do you avoid it (or do you)?

Additionally, feel free to pass along any of your own go-to, quick-and-easy meals. I've posted mine below, which I got right off of Pinterest. By the way, have you heard of AllRecipes' Dinner Spinner? It's an app for a smartphone that lets you find a recipe by using a few categories (Type of meal, main food, and length of time). For example, the other night I had tilapia and no recipes, so I chose "main meal", "fish", and "20 minutes and under", and the site came up with numerous choices. I also read the comments on my chosen recipe selection for additions and suggestions, several of which enhanced the meal. Having started this new diet/way of eating with T, we've chosen to get creative, and we value each bite, so I want to truly enjoy what I eat...while sometimes whipping it together quickly. You understand.

Greek Turkey Burgers
(linked to the source for copyright and picture purposes;
my comments in italics)


2 cups extra lean turkey (99 Percent Fat Free)
1/2 cup Panko bread crumbs (we can't do grain/bread right now, so I used ground flax seed)
1 tsp Garlic Powder
1/2 tsp dried oregano
1/2 tsp dried basil
1/2 tsp salt
1 egg
1 cup chicken broth
1/2 cup roasted red peppers, chopped (if you use a jarred kind, make sure to get the type that is in water, NOT oil)
1/2 cup artichoke hearts, chopped (Again, water, not oil. I used canned.)
1/4 cup Feta cheese
pinch of salt and pepper
4 low calorie whole wheat muffins (100-110 calories) (We didn't use the English muffins--no grain--but we didn't feel at all deprived)
4 T fat free sour cream

In a bowl, add the turkey, Panko, garlic, oregano, basil, 1/2 tsp salt, and egg. Using your hands, mix until combined. Split into four equal portions and form into patties. 

You’ll need  a skillet that has a lid. Place it over medium high heat and spray with cooking spray. Allow to get hot but not smoking. Cook the patties for about 3 minutes, or until browned. Turn over and cook for another 3 minutes. Add the chicken broth to the pan, cover and allow to steam for about 10 minutes or until the internal temperature of the patties reaches 165 degrees. Remove from pan and allow to drain on a stack of 3-4 paper towels. 
In a bowl, add the artichoke hearts, roasted red peppers, feta, and a pinch of salt and pepper. 

Lightly toast the English muffins. Spread the English Muffins with 1/2 T fat-free sour cream on each side. Place the turkey patties on the English muffins, add the artichoke/red pepper mixture.

9 and 35

Yesterday was my birthday. Halfway through my 30s, 34 seems so different than 35. I had that weird feeling for a while, and I'm mostly over it, but a few nagging thoughts lingered. In some ways, I'm not where I thought I'd be. I certainly didn't see myself unemployed, but that's a finite situation. When I put that up against the amazing husband and son, caring family, and fantastic friends I have, it doesn't seem important at all. Honestly, if I allowed my job to solely define me, I'd have serious problems. Right now the job of full-time motherhood is a gift, one I recognize as such every day, partially because that, too, is finite. So yesterday I got to spend time with J, feel like a celebrity with all of the birthday wishes on Facebook, go to dinner and a movie, and get a secret gift from T even though I told him neither he nor J could get me a present. He told me Penny had done it. Oh, Penny.

Yesterday also marked J's nine-month birthday. To borrow from Amalah, as of now, darling boy, you have been in the world as long as you were in my tummy. You have grown and changed so much, more than I ever even had a concept of. My mom asked me, "Did you ever know you could love something so much?", and I replied that I had a vague idea, of course, but I didn't know. How could I? You look like a perfect combination of Daddy and me, we think, even though in certain pictures you look more like one of us than the other. You have Daddy's height, hands and feet, and long eyelashes. You have my multiple sneezes, the tons-of-hair gene, and chin. We can't decide whose eyes you have, but, kiddo, they are gorgeous.

You don't say anything yet, but we know you can express yourself, and we suspect that once you start talking, you won't stop. Nobody can resist your ready smile, especially when you combine it with immediately hiding your face on my shoulder, little flirt. You delight Papa now that you recognize him on Skype, and you seem to find your older cousin Charlotte not quite as intimidating as of late, although her louder squawks still make you cry. Lots of loud noises do, but before you know it, you'll be the one making those loud noises yourself!

 Crawling like a little speed demon, you charge Penny, chasing her and shrieking with delight as she scampers away, only to return and give you kisses. With growing skill you pull yourself up on any surface you can, and the doctor says you may well walk before your first birthday. We find this both thrilling and terrifying. You love Cheerios, seem to like cheese, and aren't quite sure about pears. If you could sit and make things spin while playing music all day, you'd be perfectly content.

My dearest little man, I can't wait to see what you will do next. I love you more than mere words can begin to express, and I'm so proud and lucky to be your mommy.

This and That

First of all, if anyone knows someone at the University of Buffalo who can help me get this job I just applied for, I'd really love the help. It's a job as a student advisor, and it basically entails me prodding students to make sure they do what they need to do for graduation, get organized, and talk to parents. And some paperwork. Oh, I've had plenty of experience with all of that. I can do that 'til the cows come home. I wish there were some way I could call and just talk to someone about how kick-butt perfect I'd fit this position. But I will keep my fingers crossed and keep looking for other stuff in the meantime.

In other news, we've tried lately to get J more interaction with people and places outside our house. He still startles easily and cries, scared by a loud crow from his cousin C, a sharp bark from a dog, or loud crying from another kid. Last week I took J to a music class held in a smallish, echoey room and he did fine, probably because I had him in my lap and a bottle in his mouth the whole time. I know it just takes time and exposure, and I dislike seeing him cry, but I have to remind myself that it's all a part of him getting used to the world. Watching him figure it all out fascinates me. A few friends have told me he'll outgrow it, and I just have to keep giving him experiences. It's not as though he'll cry when he's in middle school and hears a dog bark. It's just that now he cries actual tears (they hadn't quite formed yet), so he just looks so sad, it tugs at my heart a bit. But then he'll see that same dog run after its bone and start laughing, so I know it's one more phase to go through. Pretty amazing, actually.

Today I went over to a friend's house so she could give me a bunch of her boys' old summer clothes. I love the fact that J may well wear them starting tomorrow...and we may even [wait for it] take off the storm windows. Ye gods! Could spring actually stick around? We've got a record-breaking temperature week coming up, so I want to get outside as much as possible before we get hit with at least one more arctic blast. I wouldn't be surprised if we got one more round of wet snow before spring and summer truly hit, but in the meantime, I'll just try to enjoy outside and the time I get to spend in it.

Happy weekend, everyone, and happy St. Patrick's Day!

Reflections on a Year

All right, I'll do it: I'll review 2011 for myself.

January started out (no, I am NOT going to through this month by month; January had a lot going on, as you'll read) pretty eventful:  My sister had her beautiful daughter, we found out we were having a boy (on the same day!  Although I'll allow that C's birth trumped J's revealed gender), and my youngest sister got engaged.  Oh, and we got a new-to-us car.

As the year moved on, I became more pregnant and more worried about how the local budget would affect my job.  I home-schooled an amazing boy and got to give him some small semblance of a normal life before he succumbed to cancer just before Christmas.  We repainted the guest room to become the baby's room, got furniture and many lovely gifts from many lovely people, added a few new fixtures and paint colors to other parts of the house, and put car seat bases in.  I fell more in love with my husband and my new niece, gained a new respect for my sister as she tried on motherhood for the first time, and found out my other sister would have a baby in November. I also gained a new appreciation for my own mother and mother-in-law, especially, as they guided me through those first few months with J.  My friend M taught me how to change a boy's diaper without getting peed on...though J still manages to get control of the hose every now and then.

Well, budget came through, J was born and T and I became parents, and five days after that, I lost my job.  This led to scrambling desperately for health insurance, and T took on that burden alone, as I was in no condition to do anything but nurse and not walk up and down stairs.  I looked for jobs every day, went on a few interviews, and came to realize a few things:

1) Once fall hit, I realized that while unemployment was (and is) scary, I would never, ever have had this time otherwise.  I would've gone back to work with J at eight weeks old in day care, and now he's over six months and I have spent almost every day getting to know him and see him grow and change. I've used the word "serendipitous" more than I ever thought I would.  I may never have this chance again to spend time with my child, and I'm grateful for every day of it.

2) Perhaps I need to/want to do something other than teaching.  I love the classroom, but my former place of employment never felt quite right, as I've written about before. The combination of lack of teaching positions available, the knowledge that the 2012-2013 budgets for schools will tighten even more, and the sheer necessity to look at my other skills and talents has led me to believe perhaps I could do something different yet still connected to what I love.  Still waiting to see how that turns out, fingers crossed, and I have a few leads that I will pursue until someone shakes my hand and says, "Welcome aboard".  I have to, financially, and I want to, personally.

3) You can still manage to do a lot with less and remain happy.  Forced perspective is still perspective.

So motherhood has been incredible and stressful and scary and wonderful. I've made new friends, caught up with old ones, and worked hard on keeping those people in my life who enrich it and dropping those who don't.  I've gone through peaks and valleys with my husband and realized even more than before that I'm grateful every day to walk through life side by side.  Friends of mine expanded their own families and allowed me to celebrate other milestones with them.  I'd say I feel fortunate that 2011 has, for me, been the best year of my life so far.  We'll see what 2012 brings.

Resolutions?  Oh, I don't know...I feel sometimes they're these grand ideas that make us feel bad when they don't come to fruition.  But I think it's good to have goals, so I'll make a few:

• Read as many of the books on my shelf as possible.  I've had unread books there for a year or more.
• Get a job and do it to my best ability
• Stay healthy in terms of exercise and eating, but allow myself rest and treats, too
• Continue making my marriage a partnership with my best friend
• Be as good a mother to J as possible while accepting the fact that I'll have bad days
• Do things that honestly enrich my life.  Most of these don't include anything electronic.

I think that's a good start.

Trade-offs

So I've had a theme in my posts lately, and this one will follow that theme.  I think it's because tomorrow is the first day of school and for the first time in a long while, I won't be part of it.  No laying out that "first day of school" outfit the night before, getting my lunch ready, making sure I have my class lists and attendance book all set to go.  That thrill of a new year, new possibilities in teaching. 

But I'm not sad, not really.  Well, I do feel a bit bittersweet.  However, I have to say that when I watch the kids walk down the path to school and I get to do so in my pajamas while holding my son, who just rolled over for the first time today, I will feel lucky that I have this time, even if it means we're tightly budgeting and a wee bit scared for the future.  Any extra minutes I get to spend with J, I consider a gift, something I wouldn't have if I still had a job.  So there's not a thing wrong with that.

Plus job hunting has reminded me of my other interests and skills--I've widened my net for possible work environments, and it's caused me to re-examine other passions I hold.  While I may not end up in a classroom setting, I can still find a way to use what I love about teaching--reaching out to others and helping them--in another arena.  Who knows what the future may hold in that respect?  I try to look at it as exciting rather than daunting, even in this hideous economy.  Meantime, watching J smile at me and grow a little each day fills me with love and the desire to do all I can for him and our family. 

So I look at September as a month of new possibilities anyway, just differently than I'd expected.  And I look forward to each day.

Transitions

Hello! Hello from a place where spring has finally sprung and the Buffalo Sabres are in the playoffs and budgets mean possible job changes (more on that later) and I just had to get new garments for my endlessly changing body. LOTS of changes.

On the pregnancy front, I have suddenly become significantly more winded after climbing stairs. I look at this in two ways, depending on my mood: 1) Oh, dear, does this just mean it will get WORSE before June? and 2) This means the baby is healthy and growing, so it makes sense that he will fight for space with my lungs. I attempt to focus on #2. It makes me happier. Little man bops around like a jumping bean right now. Yesterday he had hiccups--I know this because I was lying down with the laptop just below my belly and he actually caused the computer to move with the force of his own self. Amazing. He also seemed to respond well to the kick-ass David Bowie station T made on Pandora.com--I feel this bodes well for his musical taste. And for those who asked, here are the latest pictures of us:

I know I have no face in these, but trust that I am smiling or looking serene. The ladder in the background marks T and various wonderful, helpful friends' attempts to paint both our dining room and the baby's room. T has done a wonderful job, especially considering that we've learned the hard way that spackle takes a lot longer to dry than we had assumed and ceiling water damage means paint will either not stick or will chip right off. My dad was in town last weekend for my grandma's 96th birthday (awesome) and helped paint the ceiling in the baby's room, which looks terrific. I'm so glad he got to be a part of it, even if it did mean manual labor for him:

I just like this one because it signifies what's to come:

And here's the beginning of the paint; doesn't it look nice?

Thus the rest of the house looks like a bomb hit it while furniture and glassware waits patiently to go back to its old (or new) home, but it all means something new and nicer is on its way. More to come!

Springing up

Just reminding myself and others that teeny, tiny signs of spring have finally begun to arrive:

• I've seen shoots coming up in my neighbor's garden, and I'd probably see some in mine if I really looked. The trees have definite buds.
• The snow, while still occasionally coming down, is finally melting and there's more green and brown than white out there. To that end, I've dug out my galoshes and mucked around outside, and I've retired my big winter boots.
• Penny has joyfully discovered every damn mud patch she can find and looks as though she's wearing little dark brown shoes when she comes into the house.
• I haven't worn a wool sweater in almost a week. Considering Buffalo springs are temperamental at best, this is a huge improvement.
• Seniors have begun to pay a lot less attention in class. In a month, some will come to me and ask if there's "anything they can do to raise their grade" in order to graduate. I will tell them, again, to go back in time and do all the work they should've done up to this point.
• Runners have switched from leggings to shorts
• I have begun to consider stretching the budget to include a few more cheerful clothing pieces that will accommodate my own stretching tummy
• Cadbury Egg time has become more and more precious

In other, next generation news, Baby J has become significantly more wiggly and active, and my niece C gets cuter every blessed day. Growth happening everywhere, really!

True Love

Two days ago as T and I sat at breakfast, I told him about having some cheesy instrumental 80s TV theme song in my head. I could not remember which show it was, and it was driving me crazy. Upon my belting out the first bar, he immediately joined in and we sang it together.

"Is it Magnum?"
"No, no, that goes dum bum bum BUHnahnahnuh..."

[and I then joined in and we scatted out Magnum, P.I. together at the table and laughed hysterically.]

"But that's not it...what IS IT?"

[long pause]

"CHiPs! It's totally CHiPs!"

My husband's recall for the utterly useless is excellent. This is why 1) I had that damn song in my head all day, and 2) it's one of many, many reasons we're so well-matched.

Fortunate

Yesterday was my birthday. I'm thirty-fortunate, as dear Idealist puts it. I thought about it, and I realized how right she is. I had ideas as to what I'd be doing at around this age, those nebulous thoughts of "where I'm going to be at age ____", that sort of thing. I figured I'd have a couple of kids, married, job (not teaching...mom's the teacher), living somewhere in New England or something. Nothing fancy.

I still don't have anything fancy, but that seems right to me. I have a lot more than many people: I have a husband whom I love dearly, who loves me just as much. I have dear friends and family both far and near whom I can count on. I get to work in a profession I love that allows me to use my strengths to their utmost as long as I'm savvy enough to keep recognizing it. I'm growing a healthy baby boy, and my grandmother is still alive and sharp enough at almost 96 to know that I'm calling him after her husband and my father. My sweet little dog cannot stop cuddling with us. We have a house that remains relatively cool in the summer and warm in the winter.

I don't mean to brag. I just want to attempt to express how deeply fortunate I am and that I recognize it. Maybe not as often as I should; I think in many ways we tend to complain or brood about things going wrong. I don't know if that's media or the crazy pace of the world or what, but I do try to see at some point every day what a blessed and wonderful life I have.

Happy happenings

Consider this a counter-post to the previous one:

1) Yesterday Penny turned three. She celebrated by throwing up in the middle of the night and getting chicken for dinner as a result.

2) I think I finally felt the baby move the other day. And I'm halfway done cooking him.

3) My youngest sister just got engaged! January has given a lot of genuine happiness to my family.

A dog's life

I haven't blogged about Penny in a while. I think it's ok to entertain you with Penny Tales.

My dearest Pen loves, loves, LOVES the winter. This has upsides and downsides. Watching her run around like a fuzzy little bullet, blazing her way through the drifts and burying her snout in the snow just to look excitedly at me as if to say, "HI! Mama, this is the best thing EVER! Nowigodoitagainagainagain!!!!!", makes me laugh with delight. However, once we get her home, as you have seen, getting the snowy crust off her wee legs and tummy takes quite some time. She looks like The Thing from the Fantastic Four, only with snow. Inevitably she has to spend time thawing in the back room until we finally let her small, damp self out.

She then goes to find a bit of couch to dry out, curled up in a Pennyball. However, I don't want Her Sogginess on our nice furniture, so I drape towels on the cushions for her to lie on. Inevitably, she will manage to get to the one place I didn't cover and snuggle riiiiight...there.

As we tell her at least three times a day, what a rough, rough life she leads.

Happiness for the Holidays

Makes me miss my choir, although I had to quit for good reasons. I've always loved the Hallelujah Chorus and I love these singing flash mobs.

Summer Wrap-Up

Hi. Hi! How are you? I know I meant to post all the time during the summer and then...summer happened. And I didn't want to go upstairs to my hot computer and post. I'm sorry. Plus my laptop was broken, so I couldn't go somewhere cool to blog. I blame the laptop. Bad, bad laptop.

So I'll give you all a quick re-cap:

• Once a week, I taught Alternative Ed to about five students. These kids for the most part are more academic delinquents than juvenile; they just didn't fit the mold for normal school hours. I found them both trying and endearing. The one kid who didn't do anything now has me for 1st period English. Keep your fingers crossed for him. And me.
• Because I have an entirely new class this semester, I tried to spend 2 hours a day preparing for fall. A lot of this included reading new novels. I did pretty well--it also helps that I have no kids to take care of and that I live three hundred yards away from school, so I did a lot of photocopying over the summer.
  
• On that note, with the help of a lovely doctor-lady, I found out that I do NOT have ADHD but do have deficits in organization and time-management. Case in point: I missed our last appointment because I forgot to put it on my calendar. That, kids, defines irony. Fortunately we did the appointment over the phone. So I've tried very hard to make my Google Calendar my end-all, be-all, updating it and color-coding it and using the Task list like crazy. It's helped tremendously. As a result, for the first time EVER I started the school year today totally ready and not mildly panicked because I had everything labeled, in its proper color folder, and ready to go. I still have a lot to work on, but at least I'm getting tools in place.
• I worked out faithfully and lost no weight, nor do my clothes fit more loosely. So I went on Weight Watchers with T and got my trainer friend A to kick my butt. So far, so good.
  
• This August T and I went to Denver, CO to watch our dear friends get married on the side of a mountain--just a lucky handful of us got to see them perform their own vows (legal only in CO and PA to do that!) and all of us wept at the beauty of the moment, the couple, the scenery, the love. Plus Denver's a cool town to visit AND, as I type this, the newlyweds are headed back to Buffalo to live, so we get them back because, as I told the bride last summer, WE HAVE DIBS. I'm sorry, Bostonian and Tennesseean friends. I CALL 'EM.
• Got into the Stieg Larsson trilogy and cannot stop reading them. I just love Lisbeth Salander. LOVE her.
• Also got into Mad Men. Don Draper is the man you love to despise. He's such a terrific flawed anti-hero. I also pledge here and now to stay far, far away from the Betty Draper Method of Parenting.
• Speaking of parenting, my sister M and her husband C expect a baby in January! Plus they moved back to the B-lo as well, so it's happiness all around.
• I decided to call people and get in touch more, take my own advice and make the effort. So far, it's worked quite well. I plan to keep it that way.
• I finally found and began compiling our wedding pictures. Whoops. Looking through them and remembering the joy of the day, captured so well on film, has brought such joy. I'll try to put together an album soonish.
• OH! T got a new job and loves it. It's at a similar company to his old one but gives him the opportunity to spread his wings a little. I am so, so proud of him.

That's it, really. I never got my garden started, but we have some fun and necessary house projects coming up. T and I decided to become more organized, together, for a lot of reasons, least of which includes less stress for us. Friendships waxed and waned, small decisions we made will have good ripple effects later....really, it's just life that happened. More to come.

T and me in Colorado

A short list of happy

1) I made blackberry muffins yesterday based on an old recipe I found from Ouiser, using blackberries from our bushes outside and a few of the reviewer substitutions. They tasted quite delicious. We've had a rainy spring/beginning to summer, but boy oh boy, it's making those berries grow.

2) Penny finally gets her stitches out tomorrow and can take off that stupid Elizabethan collar and play with her buddies. I find it adorable that the one chocolate lab has been looking toward the treeline, waiting for her to emerge because he misses her.

3) My sister and her husband will have officially moved back to Buffalo as of next Thursday.

4) Spending extra time in the evening with T. because we have neither coaching nor teaching responsibilities is lovely.

5) The thought of going to Office Depot with my hyper-organized mother to get myself ready for the upcoming school year makes me absurdly excited. As I believe I have mentioned before, places like Office Depot feel like a teacher's Graceland. We walk in and just stare at the rows of colored pens and files, breathing in the possibilities....

That's all I have for now. Off to the farmer's market to perhaps buy some plants for my long-overdue garden. Yes, I realize how late in the season it is, but who cares? I'll give it a whirl.

Happy Wednesday, dears!

Two quick thoughts and an exclamation

1) There is little that's more pitiful than watching a fluffy dog stagger around, post-anesthesia, with a large shaved patch on one side of her and an Elizabethan collar (one of those cones) on, catching said collar on doorways. (She's recuperating today--they cleaned her teeth and removed a cyst; hence the surgery.)

2) Jillian Michaels should stay the hell away from yoga. I did her version this morning and she took something that involves stretching and holding poses and strength and...jillianized it. Doing three sun salutations in a row at top speed "because that's the only way you melt those pounds" is not inspiring or pleasant. She also had disdain for yoga speak, preferring not to say phrases such as "bring your heart center to your knee" because it wasn't "English". I'll do the Shred with her all day because then I feel justified in thrashing around to the beat as I try to copy Tami in the corner who's doing the beginner version, sweating, and occasionally gasping obscenities at Jillian and her blazing eyes and killer abs and tattoos. Yoga, not so much.

Here's the exclamation: We have strawberries randomly growing in our yard! I have no idea how they got there; one of us must've chucked a bad one and it took root or something. It is SO COOL. And our blackberries are growing! Yay, wild berries!

Simple Joys

I need to write this quickly because I'm on my way to do several extremely important errands that could be life-changing. Not kidding.

I've got some worries going on because of school budget woes--it's coming out soon, and things can go a few ways. One of those ways may well include massive cuts, and those would probably include me. Instead of worrying about what may or may not happen, instead of freaking, T and I are being proactive and doing what we can in the meantime--we can only control so much, so we're making sure we do and letting the rest come as it will because, honestly, that's all we can do. I mean that in a calm, ride-it-out kind of way.

So last night we ate dinner out on our porch complete with candles, a good bottle of wine we'd been saving for "something phenomenal", and a terrific thunderstorm. We ate, drank the wine, listened to the storm, and played cards all evening with Penny sometimes jumping into our laps.

That's what it's all about.

Sundries on Sunday

I have a few ideas and thoughts that have been rattling around in my head, so here they are.

• Every morning I walk to school. It's a mercifully short walk; I never have to worry about traffic or the car not starting. In the winter I do have more likelihood of a broken ankle slipping on ice, but that's it. In those minutes that I walk to school, it's absolutely quiet and it's my time that I don't have to share with anyone. Depending on what time I get out the door, I either walk in the dark of the weak early morning light or I walk with the sunrise. I can listen to the wind, watch the light play on the snow, or just think my thoughts. I gather myself for the day and whatever it will bring.

• When T and I cook together, it's always such a pleasure. Even when he can't find the sugar when it's right in front of him, or I squirt ketchup all over the stove, myself, and his socks (as I did tonight), the meal is something we create together and take joy in. It's those small pleasures that make our life together as special as it is.

• Yesterday I had to go to an unexpected funeral. A friend of ours had a darkness in himself that he couldn't shake. The service allowed those who loved him to both mourn and celebrate his life in a way that I hadn't expected possible. It just makes me want to hold onto those I love even closer, and for any of my friends or people I know who hold a similar darkness inside yourselves, please know that I and others are closer than you may think.

• My sister's getting married in June. Recently she contacted me to ask if I would read at her wedding. We've drifted a lot in the past few years due to geography and life, nobody's fault, really. She asked me because she remembered how we loved books together when we were younger and we still do today. I'd forgotten that we had that tie. It just reminds me to reach out to those I care about--relationships take effort and care if you want them to continue and grow. So I want to make more effort with those who have become "Christmas card friends", if you know what I mean.

• Penny loves to look out the window. She especially likes to sit on the pillows of our bed and just watch the world go by. Saturday night I woke in the middle of the night to her having snuck up on those pillows, right above my head, and she sat there like a little canine sentry, watching over us. Even better, she fell asleep on the pillow and woke T up by licking his head. Pets make every day better, don't they?
  

• I know I've mentioned this before, but driving past the General Mills plant when they're making cereal still makes me smile.

Have a good Monday! I'm off to bed.