Friday, March 20, 2009

This concerns me

I read an article yesterday in the NYT about Rihanna going back to Chris Brown and how a large number of teens out there think it's either her fault ("She must have provoked him") or that Brown shouldn't get in trouble because she took him back. The article also mentioned that a lot of Chris Brown fans can't get over the idea that the press is simply villfying him, and anyone who's done videos with Elmo could not do something like that. These adolsecents "see in absolutes", so it's either right or wrong. Plus the hip-hop culture sends messages that often have tones of misogeny and aggressive male behavior (and, I think, women as objects a lot of the time)--as the article reads, it's not to blame, but it doesn't help.

I get very frustrated when I hear of teens accepting violence as something that simply happens, something they have to accept, or something that they will do to another person just because "that's the way it is". I don't think we all should go running hand-in-hand through the flowers, but stories like this slay me. I realize--not firsthand, mercifully--that getting out of an abusive relationship is not easy, even when it's the obvious choice to the outsider. How do adolescents gain good ideas about how to treat each other with the role models they choose?

I didn't mean to sound down, but as the post says, this concerns me. A lot. I'd love to know your thoughts.

1 comment:

The Perfect Space said...

I am also VERY disturbed by what I've been hearing about this story. They've done polls that indicate an equal number of teens think SHE is to blame. Have you SEEN her the pictures of what he did to her face? This IS a situation in which absolutes are appropriate: there is ABSOLUTELY NO TIME when it is acceptable for a man to hit a woman. Boys don't hit girls. Period. The idea that the next generation is somehow becoming MORE accepting of this behavior says a lot about the direction in which our society is headed. As someone who has worked with pre-teens & teens & as the mother of one, I find this story disturbing on a very fundamental level.