Last night I had a well-needed dinner with two of my girlfriends who live in the city of Buffalo. We hung out when I lived there--I lived down the street from the one--although with life and family and whatnot, we didn't visit as much as we might have. You know how it goes. Well, we met at a great little place that used to be within walking distance for me but now takes about 25 minutes. I wanted to see my friends, I didn't mind the drive at all, but it really made me realize where I live now. If I want to see these lovely ladies, and I do, I have to truly make an effort. And you know, maybe that's better? When we did live close, we just sort of thought we'd see each other and didn't always take the time. Yes, we'd see each other and stop and chat if we drove or walked by each other on the street, but this past summer I really didn't see either person.
So now we make sure to call, to check in, to e-mail. It takes more effort, but it's worth it. These are two terrific women and I want to make sure we keep the friendship going. This is also why I continue this blog; it's a great way to stay in touch with my friends all over the U.S. even when we don't get a chance to talk on the phone or send our millions of e-mails that, frankly, we don't always get the chance to write. I had no idea people read this until I got calls and e-mails chastising me for not keeping up!
This rings true lately because I'm in a new job, trying to meet new people and make friends, and I have to remember that these things take time and care, like a garden needs tending. I also need to remember that everyone's different, and not everyone will respond to me the way I might like, and that geography does sometimes play a part in who feels connected to whom. Mainly I probably just need to relax and, while making the effort, realize I can't force anything, see what happens. I think when we've gotten to know our old friends we forget how hard it is to make new ones, and I need to remember that I'm not always going to have instant connections with people.
Thus, this is not really a lament, though it probably sounds like one a bit; it's just my convoluted way of reaching out to all of you and saying I'm glad you're all there.
P.S. I have to give proper credit to my sister M., who passed the NY State Bar Exam! It's one of the hardest and she busted her ass. For crying out loud, I had to schedule my wedding around it. Both she and her fiance passed (thank God)--an engagement and becoming a lawyer all in less than a month! Yay for the good guys.
Have a great weekend if I don't get to you, chickadees! Oh, and if anyone has a good turkey recipe, I'd love to have it.